I have been thinking a lot about a father's role and the value of Freedom in this grand experiment that is the United States of America. The value of Freedom that we all aspire to is still honorable even though, as fathers, we have failed in some ways to make sure everyone has the opportunity Freedom should provide. We have a system and a culture where we have seen even the most common and humble people create and ultimately realize the life they dreamed. Today as a father, I am asking myself, am I doing a good job of first demonstrating the value of Freedom to my children and then doing the work necessary to help create a path forward for them. Next, how can I be a part of helping others in my community, and then society have more opportunity to be free to work hard for the life they want.
I believe we can go a long way to solving our country's problems by becoming better fathers. Our children's first impressions of masculinity should come from an engaged father. Our sons start their lives at a deficit if they have no father to demonstrate authentic masculinity. A father's affirmation plays a crucial role in our daughter's development as she learns about her value as a woman. Replacing a father who is a good example, who provides positive instruction and is committed to his children, is hard to do.
Doing the work to define myself became the foundation for me to choose my values, and establish my identity as the father I wanted to be. To teach my children the values I had chosen, I first had to demonstrate them in my own life. How could I clearly articulate my values and speak intelligently about them without trying to live them out consistently in my own life? I can say beyond a shadow of a doubt that what I now believe is truth for my life was influenced early on by my father with his words and, more importantly, by the way, he lived his life.
If fathers are not committed to being leaders and mentors for their children, then the Freedom we have been given will surely become a weakness for us all. In many cases, I think our children have been left to be raised by a few clear-headed radicals who are very committed to values that will ultimately destroy our Freedom. They have seized the opportunity to restrict, limit, and even eliminate the Freedom as fathers we are supposed to demonstrate, teach, and provide for our children. No one is born fearful, racist, angry, or wounded. These are all learned or imposed conditions. To be clear, I think there is a fight between good and evil, and the actions of fathers will play a vital role in victory or defeat.
Keep Coming Forward!
Jim Hensel
Mayhem Mindset Coach
