I just turned 53; I make the joke I’m almost dead, “I’m on the back nine of my life; I just don’t know what hole I’m playing.” Right off, please don’t misunderstand me. I’m not trying to be dark or make light of death. However, I am looking at my life with the perspective that places extreme value on living in the present and reminding myself that my time on this planet is limited and to keep moving forward. I believe that every human being was created with a purpose. Each of us has something positive to contribute that is critically important to our family’s, community, society, and even the world.
I re-aim each day by reminding myself it’s my individual responsibility to facilitate my own freedom and to protect the freedom of the people that look to me for strength. I recite my personal code and hold myself accountable to what I have established as my personal identity and the core values I have chosen for my life. I recognize the opportunity I have to play offense and make a contribution, and that sense of purpose resonates in my heart and motivates me.
My life counts, and so does yours! If you don’t step up and take your place in life and the lives of the people who need and trust you, you WILL NOT/CAN NOT be replaced. There is no replacing who you were created to BE. For example, the power that I possess to be a positive force in my daughter's life cannot be replaced. It’s possible for it to be replicated, but not replaced. If I’m not intentional and planning/thinking/executing in their lives, they will miss out on the person I was designed to BE in their development as a person. I’m not saying that their lives wouldn’t go on without me, but I believe their development would be placed at a deficit without me as their father. I believe from the beginning of time, I was created to BE everything they need from a father, and it’s my responsibility to do the work necessary for that growth in my life and theirs.
I believe each of us as individuals was created with a specific purpose. Each one of us is designed with talents and purpose for our families, communities, and our society. When for whatever reason, we forget or don’t realize our value as an individual, and then do the work to define ourselves. When we fail to organize and grow our own lives in a manner that develops our ability to be something positive for someone else, to stand in the gap for others, then we fail to BE the leader our families and communities need us to BE. We miss out on an important part of what is purpose for our lives. From this perspective, it’s pretty easy to see how things can fall apart.
I despise it when I hear some religious person (my definition of religion: rules without relationship) say, “Well, brother bless you, God’s a big God he will get it done some another way.” If that’s your first response to this blog, then I think you are minimizing the importance of your life and the role the Creator specifically designed for you. Don’t forget that we each have the responsibility to choose for ourselves first, then live out that commitment as an example for our family and community. For sure, life will go on without you; the sun will rise tomorrow. For sure, the lives of those that love you and need you will go on, BUT they go on at a deficit! Why would you want someone else to attempt to do what you were created to BE!?!
Do not let your response to this blog be with fear or condemnation. There is no perfect with people. Life is supposed to be a constant effort to minimize mistakes and maximize our effort with a positive values-based attitude. It is possible to do the work to knock the rough edges off your life and be there for the people who are counting on you. You can’t put spilled milk back in the bottle, but you can repair yourself starting right now and make your life begin to reflect that transformation. It’s never too late; my life is proof of that.
Re-aim by holding yourself accountable. Do the work to define yourself. Establish your personal identity. Get your core values/strongest beliefs organized and written down so you can use them as force multipliers in your life. Work to create mindset tools so that you can always be in more control of your emotions. Next, put it into action by developing a great routine.
Taking the right action for yourself and the people you are responsible for must be based on what you personally believe and are committed to, not because of what someone else says or does. Your response to the adversity in your life must boil down to what you believe the right thing to do is regardless of other people's opinions or actions. This type of response is trained and will come down to doing the work ahead of time to prepare. Responding and reacting are two very different things. The proper response means you have done the job to define yourself, and you have practiced how you want to think. S&H!
Keep Coming Forward
Jim Hensel
